Lunch with Judy and Candy

Computer-generated Image–surprisingly close to reality

Monday, June 02, 2025

I had lunch yesterday with long-time friends I hadn’t seen in years. We first met during a pivotal chapter in my life, when I was a breast cancer patient participating in a support group. They were the group’s unofficial leaders—steady and compassionate, offering wise listening and unwavering kindness. The connections forged in that group felt deep and enduring. Despite years and distance, our shared strengths and vulnerabilities still feel familiar.

It had been a long time since we’d laid eyes on one another, but recently, they wandered separately into the department store where I work. We recognized each other immediately—like “old friends,” which we are—and promised to meet for lunch soon.

Judy and Candy are continuing to nurture the cancer support group–welcoming women facing breast cancer and other illnesses. Their dedication says much about their character, and just as much about our deep human need for community when we’re navigating illness. Sitting with them again felt comforting as they shared how the group continues to evolve.

Conversation came easily. We didn’t need to fill in every gap—we simply slipped into the familiarities of our old connection: talking about our lives now, the realities of aging, fond memories, and the ever-present question: What may come next? There was laughter, warmth, and a few comfortable silences. Our lunch felt less like a reunion and more like a quiet rekindling—an affirmation of ties built during significant uncertainties and shared strengths.

They spoke of their early lives—how, as young women, they each bravely moved to Alaska during its formative days, just as it prepared for Statehood. They met there, in a time when its cities were small and its spirit was wide open. Those were the early days of loosening social constraints for women, and they embraced the freedom and opportunity. Eventually, each moved—independently but around the same time—to Central Oregon, where they reconnected.

They asked after my donkey, Pimmy, who is doing well—her illnesses are stable and under control. They asked about my other critters: sweet turkey Lacey, noisy Cockatoo Peaches, and Chase (yes, that Puppy-from-Hell, Chase, who still lives with me).

The best part of our lunch was simply knowing—knowing one another well and knowing where we’ve been. We didn’t just share memories; we shared something more enduring–a kind of bond formed while at our most human, our most open. That’s what has made the cancer group so special, and it’s what made our lunch such a gift.

Dear Friends: Like Alaska in its frontier days, Central Oregon is an “honest place.”—Diana

On Her Birthday

Wednesday, March 05, 2025

If genetic advancements had been available during my mother’s lifetime—capable of extending health and longevity—I might be celebrating her birthday with her today. I’ve long wished for at least one more conversation, a chance to ask the many questions that could fill the blank spaces of her early life.

Reflecting on why I never asked more about her life brings back memories of my own trials and tribulations growing up. Each day was a lesson in adaptation, filled with new challenges and shifting realities. I naturally focused on myself—learning, adjusting, and figuring out how to navigate life one step at a time.

Back then, I felt an urgent need to escape a past that seemed confining; I needed to step into a future that was broader, more inviting, and yet daunting. All that forgotten past included both my parents and grandparents. I might never have seriously reconsidered all of them if not for the rise of DNA and its profound ability to connect one’s history with one’s future.

I give deep nods to technology and genetics and to an equally powerful force—the unbreakable connection between parent and child. Its hold isn’t always smooth but shapes and defines us in enduring ways.

Today, on my mom’s birthday, I’ll hold her in my thoughts. A sudden memory might surface, filling in a blank or two about her life. I like to imagine that she can somehow “hear” my thoughts—so I’ll share a few, letting her know how I’ve grown and changed, shaped in no small part by her insight and encouragement.

Dear Friends: Science fundamentally reshapes how we perceive and evaluate ourselves. Diana

Eventing

Saturday, September 28, 2024

In today’s header photo, my dinner partner Adrain captures me and my dinner at the restaurant, Spork. This is a mirror image of the one I took that evening of him and his meal. I used my photo (a little blurry and fun) as yesterday’s blog header.

Adrain’s photos are good. He loves photographing with his phone and sharing images. Today, I’m using his photos as reminders of our enjoyable event.

The restaurant was fun. Our event is one I’ll remember more after having become lost on the westside while trying to find Spork; Adrain came to my rescue.

I’m a carb counter and didn’t recognize anything related to my preferences on Spork’s Asian-style menu, so I ordered what Adrain loves: crispy chicken on rice and salad. He’s right, a tasty dish.

Today’s header photo beer!

Writing about my dinner with Adrain has reminded me of “My Dinner With Andre,” a popular 1981 movie directed by Louis Malle. After the experience of “Spork,” I could write more about atmosphere and conversation while dining out with a friend. Now, I discover myself wishing to recall that old movie better and will try to find and watch it again.

Dear Friends: Each experience is an event. Diana

Sporked!

Friday, September 27, 2024

The header captures my friend and co-worker Adrain tackling his crispy chicken bowl. I’m sitting opposite him and will do the same after my camera action. That was yesterday evening, at a restaurant called Spork, where we met for dinner.

My drive there and my search for Spork illustrated how much his city has grown, and our dining experience updated my restaurant behavior. I was a fish dipping into deeper waters.

About Adrain: This year, he’s been a good friend to me and my coworkers at the department store where we work. He had a previous career, and that path was recently relaunched. He’s excited—with good reason—for he’s bright and capable. We enjoy swapping perspectives and encouraging one another.

Everything I do is typically on this city’s east side. I rarely travel to the busy and touristy west side–where I became lost yesterday evening. Fortunately, I was near Spork, and Adrain found me, guided me into the restaurant, and introduced its–what? Tai/Chinese?–menu while explaining the ordering/seating processes. I found myself in good hands.

Brand new to me was the camera action in that busy restaurant. Almost everybody was taking pictures—selfies and groups—similar to lunchrooms in my part-time jobs. Adrain always uses his camera like a pro, and this dinner wasn’t any exception; he comfortably photographed and texted. So did everybody else, and soon, me, too, a little.

The upshot is that the evening might have relaunched Miss Eastsider. She ventured out, explored new venues, appreciated her kind friend, and had mucho fun.

Dear Friends: Plus, I found that another special buddy is my phone’s camera! Diana

Word World

Thursday, June 06, 2024

An article entitled “What’s your nudge word for 2024? Let us help you discover it” caught my attention in today’s Washington Post. I was attracted to the idea of a nudge word after earlier exploring something similar and selecting a word.

The Post set up the discovering process as a game. I studied it and decided to play.

Everything starts by identifying an overarching word. The lead question is: What single word describes your hopes and dreams for 2024? The game then offers many categorical choices: active, optimistic, mindful, relationships, strength, growth, and personal relationships. I chose “mindful.”

Next, another game step was to “Focus on words that will nudge you toward positive change.” Many words related to mindfulness were offered, and I selected such as observe, awe, gratitude, notice, thankful, breathe, awareness, anticipate, and balance. Finally, I found one that summarized it all, and already that word was a favorite: appreciate.

I’ll take it. So, “appreciate” will be my nudge word for 2024.

Last month, I was thinking about “appreciate” in relation to my upcoming birthday. I wished to actively and often feel more appreciative as a change and birthday gift to myself. For several weeks, I paused and focused on appreciating but eventually got too busy and preoccupied with unrelated thoughts.

I appreciate the Post article’s cool word game which helped me renew a pleasing frame of mind. To me, appreciating touches a deep sense of gratitude and recognition, and taps into wishes to feel seen, valued, and understood. I am recommitting to actively being mindful and appreciative and staying on track this time.

Dear Friends: Words, tiny little abstracts that trigger big feelings and thoughts. Diana

Surprise

Friday, May 03, 2024

This is my birthday month, and typically, I ignore my birthdays. However, this year, I feel different. I want to give myself a gift—something special, like a fancy saddle, a new dress, or an Uber laptop. My changed attitude this time around surprises me, but I’m not obsessing about it; I’m simply enjoying the possible fun of self-surprising.

Planning for a self-surprise has me preparing an unexpected and exciting experience–a surprise to inject novelty and wonder into my birthday. It’s a fun way of feeling joy and breaking up routines. Besides, the process will keep me curious for weeks about what will become that special delight.

The gift could be more broad. I could arrange to take a special trip or sign up for a class or workshop to learn something new and wonderful. It could also be a scavenger hunt: I could wrap something that I want or is a special treat and hide it somewhere. I could create a series of clues leading to the hidden gift’s location, stash them, and enjoy my gift later.

In this little mini-adventure, I am blindfolded and exploring. It’s a roll of the dice and requires the element of surprise. Any outcome must be tailored to my interests and above all, very manageable.

Dear Friends: Who knows what’s coming! Diana